June 6, 2020

Humbled Females: new forum reply to The Need for Dominance

New reply from MasterTony2469

<p>@TryingMyBest – you may have answered your own question with the response above. she had a distant father and mom was critical. It’s possible that she is missing both at some level.</p>
<p>It’s likely mom gave her what little approval she got. she likely gleaned approval from the completed job when mom wasn’t critical. The distant father might mean she interprets you not being critical or controlling enough to mean you’re drifting away and don’t care and are growing distant as her father did. Likely correlating distancing to not caring.</p>
<p>Some need the more “hands-on” style of dominant leadership. she likely craves your approval AND criticisms to gauge her value. When you do neither… she’s lost and afraid. <br /><br /></p>
<p>Two ways to mitigate her feelings is to discuss them. When I do A, what do you feel and experience? What does that mean to you?</p>
<p>It is not likely she’ll abandon her childhood conditioning easily simply from you reassuring her. I think you’ll be more successful with direction and reassurances. You’ll then feed her idea of submission and accomplish what you desire. you’ll find a more harmonious dynamic with a happier submissive.</p>


Original Post by TryingMyBest

The Need for Dominance

<p>So here's the thing. We are a happily married couple, and when I say happy, I mean really happy. We do everything with each other, get along really well and just are happy to be in each other's company. When I dated my wife, we agreed that we would have a d/s relationship, this is something we both wanted and felt good about.</p>
<p>Now that we are married for a few years, I have been remiss. As long as my wife is obedient more or less, and she is! then I am happy to let things just be, and to sail along. But my wife is not happy about that at all. If I don't assert my dominance, i.e. regular expectations, demands and punishments, she starts sinking. She starts getting distant, wanting to be by herself, starts feeling bad about all sorts of things, is horribly critical of herself and sort of slides to something like depression. At this point, I know I have to take charge, make strong demands, dish out the spankings and so on, until she gets back on even keel. </p>
<p>So here is the question. Why would a woman who is happily married, who does not really have any worries to speak of, who is in a really good relationship. why does she start getting down if there are no demands and no punishments. It's not like she likes getting spanked, she really doesn't, and the demands are not easy. But if I don't spank her, she will do everything necessary in order to get one. What is missing? What is she looking for?</p>

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